Sometimes, this fear of spiders causes
me to experience mild paralysis and elevated heart rate at the sight
of a cleverly-disguised ball of fuzz. Without my contacts in, these
wads of fabric become very convincing spiders. I often wonder whether
the spiders who live in my walls spend hours contriving these
practical jokes and then sit back and watch me freak out. I can't say
I'd blame them – I'm sure it's quite a sight to behold.
I wish I could say spiders and fuzz are
the only causes for mild paralysis and elevated heart rate. Being a
worrier, I often worry myself into full-blown fear. Listing all the
causes of such fear would take way too long, and would actually be
quite unnecessary. With the possible exception of the irrational
spider fear, the rest all have one common factor: I don't trust God
enough to take care of ___. Usually, that blank contains the word
“me.” Occasionally, it contains the name of a friend or family
member I'm afraid of losing in one way or another, or who happens to
be going through a tough time. This lack of trust in God makes all of
my fears irrational fears – no different from my fear of tiny
arachnids, and no less ridiculous than my fuzz paralysis. These
situations I experience are mere fuzz in comparison with God's power.
Even the more serious circumstances are tiny spiders next to a giant
steel-toed boot. Even if I were to meet the tarantula of problems –
the death of a loved one, poverty, cancer – God is big
enough to squash it like a bug. “So
we say with confidence, 'The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.
What can mere mortals do to me?'” (Heb 13:6, NIV).
So
even if I live the rest of my life petrified of spiders, I should be
able to handle real life with grace and dignity – for what can mere
spiders and fuzz do to my God?
